Today is day 7 of PRIDE month and I have been seeing a lot of Facebook posts about loving people in the LGBTQ community even though their family doesn’t. And that’s something I never could understand; no longer loving your child.
Explain to me how you could carry a life inside of you for nine months, hear his heartbeat, fall in love with his kicks and jolts, name him, cry as he is handed to you in the birthing room and still turn him away because he is either gay or trans. How do you celebrate countless birthday parties, watch as Christmas gifts are open, cheer for the Honor Roll, kiss the boo boo’s, and dry the tears only to say, “you’re not welcome here”? I can not even fathom thinking that if anyone mistreats my child, it’s a wrap and then be the main one to cast them out. How?
I understand you raised your son or daughter to be heterosexual, but parents have nothing to do with sexuality. I know that you planned their whole life before they were born and you pictured them going to prom with that handsome guy or pretty girl. You may have even pictured juggling soccer practice with homework and other extracurriculars. Maybe you would have to yell because the band in the garage is too loud and they aren’t very good. Maybe you come home one day to someone you have to chase out of the house because your daughter fell for some little boys lies.
And now, after the infamous “Coming Out” speech, you realize those things you forsaw are never going to happen. And sure, that hurts. But remember when you found out you were expecting? And you said, “I cant be the same person anymore. I cant do what I’ve been doing because I have another life to think about”. It’s the same thing now. Your baby just told you that he or she is different. And this world is going to try its hardest to defeat them, grind them up and turn them into nothing. Your child just made themselves a target for a hate crime and your response was, “Get out!”, “not in my house!”, “How could you do this to me?”.
Are they no longer your child? The baby that you loved so much? One conversation transformed them into a demon, an outsider. The person that was supposed to love them the most, proudly exclaimed, “I do not love you anymore”; whether you used those words or not. You cast them to the monsters of the world. Why? That’s no longer your blood? That’s not still the same being that was connected to you by an umbilical cord for 9 months? That you fed via your breast? That you cried over when he left for the first day of school? He transformed right in front of you to someone you never even met. Impossible!
The world is too harsh and life is too short for you to reject or deny your offspring. Call them, text them, even if its only for 5 minutes. Even if its the only time you call this year. Just call. And if they don’t answer, leave a message. Explain that you don’t know why you feel the way that you do about their choices but you love them. And you hope that the evil of the world hasn’t tainted their spirit.
That one phone call will mean everything to SOMEBODY.
And if you are someone who has been cast out and you’re reading this, know that you will always have a friend in Zion. I love each and every one of you! If you ever need to talk, feel free to contact me at any time.